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I recently had a revelation as I approach my 2 year anniversary at my organization. I’m in the wrong field, and in the wrong culture. I work in an environment where failure is not an option, and stuff gets done because 1. Someone said it would and 2. Everyone else kills themselves to do it. Every day I find myself saying “I’m not an idiot” out loud. This is typically responded to with a variation of “try harder”.
I spend most of my childhood trying to fly, read minds, be invisible and shoot lasers out of my eyes. Knowing your limits is a lesson learned early. In my entire time in my current gig I have never dreaded waking up and going to work until now. Reading Seth Godin’s book “Linchpin” didn’t really help matters either.
I question everything. I do it not out of insolence, but because clarity drives my understanding. In an environment where the only clarity is “I asked you do to something, do it”. The DO and don’t THINK or ASK QUESTIONS message has been received and now I am presented with yet another challenge.
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