Year 1. Get settled in new digs outside womb.
Year 2. Start talking. Trend continues to present day.
Year 3. Prove to mother I could read. The definitive test? Reading “Ringling Bros. & Barnum & Bailey’s Circus” from a billboard. Learned to cook scrambled eggs with assistance
of milk crates used to access stove due to small stature. Call 911 successfully provide address when mom falls unconscious.
Year 4. Move to Alaska. Start school.
Year 5. Start drawing regularly. Hold deep resentment towards father for promising, then not delivering Mickey Mouse telephone.
See my next 5 years here.